Pacis are for Mouths

Graeme has been driving me nuts lately. It seems every month or so we go through a week of pure hell. Whining, defiance, throwing, hitting, biting, yelling, crying....you name it. This week, while Ian has a double-ear infection and roseola Graeme has head-butt him, pushed him off the couch, squished his belly, and taken every toy he's tried to play with. We are totally worn out. Usually by the time it breaks I find myself wondering about all the other things I'd rather be doing, like shoving bamboo shoots up my finger nails or cleaning the grease out of oven vent with a q-tip or writing a dissertation (the last time I remember truly hating the moment). Usually about 2 weeks or so after an episode I zero in on the cause. In early April I decided it was because I had given him too long a leash and needed to reign him in. I had basically tossed in the towel on parenting because everything was a battle, which only made for more battles. Kids need boundaries, yada yada yada. Well, it seemed to work, sort of. I don't know what his deal is now, but he's a 35 pound pain in the ass. Usually in the middle of one of these "events" Steve and I give each other the "throw the f---- pacifiers out the window" look because G screams for them in the midst of his hourly sobs and we get sick of the battle. Well, last night I pulled the "if you don't brush your teeth I'm taking paci" threat. He wouldn't brush, so I took the paci. And he started screaming for 2 hours. Steve, bless him, had the patience to sit through it. I was dreaming up ways to escape, but still keep my really cool Mother's Day present.

Today G asked for the paci a few times and I was able to divert him, but decided that maybe this was the time to get rid of them for good. I don't want to just go cold-turkey. It doesn't feel right to take away his favorite comfort with little warning. So, I decided to take a tip from the Dockins' and told him that there is a special store where you can buy toys with pacis. The idea is that we buy a toy for him in advance and arrange a "deal" with the store owner, and then he goes for the actual pick-up and "pays" for the toy with his pacis. G liked the idea of buying something with his pacis and wanted to go right away to get a Spider Man. We have to wait for daddy, I said. Steve is game for the idea. So, at bedtime tonight he asked for a paci. Steve gave it to him, but reminded him that we are going to use the pacis to buy a special toy. "Pacis are for mouths, Daddy, not toys," was his reply. Sigh. He's on to us....again.