Trying to be Cool

I'm a bit on the socially awkward side, or at least that's how I perceive myself. Probably not the coolest person on the planet, a bit nerdy, intellectual snob, not very quick witted, don't make friends easily, but a good person. So, in an attempt to be cool (or because I have so much free time these days) I decided to try socializing like the kids do these days by opening a Facebook account. Steve got me started on this. He googled a person and their Facebook page came up so he joined to learn more about this person. And then he started getting requests from old high school buds to be "friends." I was totally intrigued so I opened an account too. And, since I've been obsessed, intrigued, fascinated, and dumbfounded by this "social networking." This afternoon I spent an hour searching for "friends," which makes me feel about as pathetic as I did in high school when I didn't get an invitation to the coolest party in town. However, I was oddly obsessed and couldn't stop myself from typing in name after name and getting excited when I found someone I knew. Steve came home and I happily reported that I now have 18 friends. Wow, I feel so cool. And then I see people who have like 500 million friends. Oh come on, I bet my friends are more meaningful than your friends.

The other day I invited our oldest (in terms of years of service as Maguire affiliates and not chronological age) friends over for a BBQ this weekend. Before they even responded Steve reported that they were going to the Cape this weekend and wouldn't be able to make it...information he gleaned from Vaughn's Facebook page. So, here we are "friends" and we can totally socialize and keep up on each other's lives without even opening our mouths or speaking a word to each other. I feel so hip.

Really, though, I feel pathetic. And, not because I don't have a billion friends, but because this really doesn't feel as satisfying as a warm hug from an old (or new) friend and a cold beer and some good conversation with eye contact.

I can't say that I won't stop searching for "friends" though.